Speak the Truth

Yes, it really is that simple.

That simple, and that

hard

.

If you think that I am full of nonsense, or that I am wildly overstating the case, or that I am writing more of a self-indulgent manifesto than a rational call to action, I am perfectly fine with that!

I actually think that is a very healthy approach to take to what I am saying.

Scepticism

is enormously healthy because scepticism requires both logic and empirical validation to be transformed into acceptance.

Fortunately, you have access to all the logic

and empirical validation you could ever desire – today, right now, this minute!

For the logic

, you can turn to my two previous books, and my podcasts.

For empirical validation, things are much easier.

You do not need to buy and study any books. Thank heavens, you do not need to listen to a near-infinite series of podcasts. You do not need to learn ancient Aramaic, how to juggle, ride a unicycle, or breathe water.

You only need to open your mouth.

Integrity in Honesty

If you really

do

dislike it when your mother’s name shows up on your call display, you may well be tempted to yank the phone off its handle and yell at her that she is a fellow slave who is keeping you down, that she bullies you like a cornered rat, and she serves the masters who rule us all!

Not only would this be unwise, it would also be dishonest.

The fact of the matter is that you

do not know for certain the validity of these theories

.

I am not asking you to believe beyond a shadow of a doubt that these theories are true.

I think that would be a very bad idea.

The truth of the matter – as it stands for you, right now – is that you

genuinely do not know why you cannot speak the truth with your mother

.

Earlier, we talked about a 15

th

century man watching a ship on an ocean descend slowly over the horizon. That observation is the

fact

that he is working with – he does not as yet have a theory as to why that phenomenon is occurring.

If this man simply started yelling at people that the world was round, whizzing around the sun at 30 km a second, that the sun was the center of the solar system, and is also whizzing along at terrifying speeds – for a combined planetary motion of 900 km/s – everyone would think that he was just mad! They would be right in that evaluation too, since he would have no theoretical or empirical proof for what could only be considered entirely wild propositions!

You have a fact to work with in your relationship with your mother, which is that you do not like it when her name lights up your call display.

You do not know exactly

why

that “sinking sensation” is occurring.

I have put forward a theory as to why that sensation is occurring – and the likely events that will unfold if you speak the truth.

However, it remains as yet only a theory.

It is a theory, of course, that should give you some great comfort – despite the anxiety

it provokes.

If the theory is true, then you have

damn good reasons for staying silent

, for conforming, for refraining from speaking the truth – and for lying to yourself about why.

It makes little sense to hide if you are not being hunted.

I am telling you that you hide because you are being hunted – but this has not been proven, and therefore must be put to the test.

Your test.

So – call your mother.

Tell her that you feel unease – or a sinking sensation

, or anxiety, or whatever it is – when her name lights up your call display.

That’s pretty terrifying, isn’t it?

Good.

Feel the burn!

I mean – you don’t want to go through the rest of your short life utterly deluded about the content and quality of your “relationships,” do you?

Since you yearn and

burn

for the truth – as we all do – don’t you want to find out if your relationships can support it?

Since you yearn and burn for love

– which requires the truth, as we have discussed – don’t you want to find out if your relationships can support it?

Since you yearn and burn for intimacy, integrity

, trust and devotion – all of which require the truth – don’t you want to find out if your relationships can support them?

If your existing relationships

will not only

never

give you what you want, but exist only to rob you blind, don’t you want to stop wasting your life?

Now you can.

So – all you have to do is tell your mother

how you feel

.

When you are talking to her – particularly for the first time – you cannot with certainty tell her that you know exactly why you are feeling what you are feeling. Yes, she might frighten you with unconscious or subtle threats of attack or abandonment – but you have no real evidence of that as yet! Thus it would be entirely unjust – and abusive – to attack her with

conclusions

when you have as yet only

facts

.