The Empiricism of Emotions
A
s we can see from the above example, it is clear that the debate you are really having is not with your parents, but
with your own emotions
.
Everything that you ever need to know about any of your relationships
is available to you in that split second of emotional
authenticity
that occurs when the phone rings, and you look at the call display.
Whatever your emotions
tell you in that split second before your defences can react is the natural and basic truth about that relationship.
And – believe it or not – your emotions
are in fact trying to
help you
by telling you the truth about your relationships!
The Propaganda of Regret
(I will use the word “emotions” in this section to describe our deepest feelings that accumulate from experience, rather than the more conscious emotions described in the previous section.)
Your emotions
are in fact telling you that you will not live forever, that there are no unchosen positive obligations, that the hours, days, weeks, months and years that you waste in negative, dull, abusive or unproductive relationships are never “refunded” to you – and that in particular, with your family, the endless “propaganda of regret” is nothing more than a corrupt and exploitive lie – a secular “hell” that was invented to enslave you.
When we are taught to fight ourselves, we always end up enslaved. The priest
who hates and fears his own sexual impulses remains utterly enslaved. The citizen who hates and fears his own desire for freedom remains utterly enslaved. The child who hates and fears his own dislike of his parents remains utterly enslaved.
Emotions are the empiricism of values
– defences are the religion of subjugation.
To become authentic – to become who you
truly are
– requires
slowing down
.
When the phone rings, and you see the call display
, invoking guilt-ridden or self-recriminatory defences is the most fundamental self-rejection that you are capable of.
The insecure and enslaved man says:
“
I
must not
feel this way!
”
The man who has at least a chance for freedom asks:
“
I
wonder
why I feel this way?
”
In religious terms, the enslaved man says:
“
I
must not
doubt there is a God!
”
The man who can be free asks:
“
I
wonder
why I feel there is no God?
”
The Facts of Your Feelings
All I am talking about – like any competent empiricist – is working with the
facts
.
The
facts
of your
feelings
.
Working with the facts of your feelings does not mean treating them as epistemological absolutes. Emotions do not equal knowledge any more than our senses equal the scientific method
.
Propaganda will always seek to inflict
negative moral judgments
on your authentic emotional responses.
Remember, earlier in this book, we talked about how
false answers
are the exact opposite of
true curiosity
– and so knowledge.
When faced with the reality
of our feelings: “
I do not want to talk to my parents
” – it is an utterly false answer to “explain” those feelings away by saying: “
Because I am a bad person
.” It makes about as much sense as saying, “
I want to masturbate because I am tempted by the devil.
” It is a mad fiction designed to set you at war against yourself and so have you remain enslaved to those who define such false “morality.”
In any science
– in any rational philosophy – the real, honest, productive and true response to any new information is
curiosity
.
If you stand at the port in Lisbon
in the 15
th
century, watching the Santa Maria sailing off across the Atlantic Ocean, and see the hull slowly disappear “into” the ocean – and then the lower masts, and then the “crow’s nest” – you can either make up an “explanation” – “
OMG Poseidon, like, totally ate that ship!
” - or you can admit a lack of knowledge, and remain curious.
“
I wonder what happened to the ship?”
Making up an answer will keep you mired in a stupid, exploitive and destructive state of piggish ignorance.
Retaining your curiosity may lead you to the truth:
that the world is round
.
Your eyes provide you an objective
experience of what is happening – that the ship appears to be slowly “descending” into the water.
Based on this empirical information – what do you do? Do you make up an answer, or do you explore the question?
When the phone rings and you look at the call display, your emotions provide you clear and empirical information about your relationships.
Based on this empirical information – what do you do? Do you make up an answer (
“
I am a selfish child!
”) or do you explore the question (“
I wonder why I dislike it when my parents call…
”)?